Sunday 23 December 2012

Trying not to laugh?

When I was at Richmond Station this morning as I was early and having a cup of tea, I tweeted that I was trying not to laugh at a gentleman who was half cut. Actually, half cut is perhaps a little kind as he was totally intoxicated!

As I watched I saw him attempting to walk from the entrance to a ticket booth. This was quite a sight I can tell you. It was as if this man was one of those people from a bygone era who walked a tightrope across Niagara Falls. The great Charles Blondin must have surely looked like this man when he wowed crowds of onlookers as he milked walking across the Falls, feigning cascading to his death below.

This spectacle was played out over at least 10 minutes. Now I should point out that the distance from the entrance of the station to the ticket booth cannot be more than 10 yards! It may well have been half a mile. He went left, he went right. Backwards, forwards and then to a grinding halt. It was when he took a running race in the general direction of the ticket booth only to return to his original spot, stop and open a tin of 'Carlsberg Special Brew' while swaying that I could not contain open laughter.

A kindly station worker tried to assist him - see him to the outside of the station - but he loudly protested that he wasn't drunk. At this my laughter started to induce pain. Leading him outside the station worker proudly returned. Seconds later the man came in again too quickly and ended up sliding across the station foyer but with tin in the air and not a drop split. All I can say is that I was fortunate that I had not consumed too much of my tea, otherwise I may have had an accident.

The very patient station worker guided him outside again and sadly he did not return. 

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